The Goal

So far, I am 30 years old, and again I am going to choose the primary goal of my life. This is a very important question to me, unfortunately, not clear after all changes in my life that had happened recently.
Actually, this is the question I asked myself when I had decided to quit from WebCanape, Smolensk, Russia, and leave for Ingate in Tula. On May, my mother passed away, and I made a decision to come back and spend the summer with my dad, to help him, to help with the parents' house, and the small local business. It was very important to me.
Now I see that my dad is okay, and his life is getting better and better. Also, a new mistress of the house is going to appear. So, I have nothing to worry about with the issue of Przhevalskoye. Just finishing the juridical things with the heritage. And I guess, after that, there will be little in what I will be involved there.
On this occasion the more important question becomes 'where to go further'.
The issue of love, and family, and children is getting more, and more, and more important to me. Too much regrettable, that it is hardly achievable altogether in my case, in my country. This is the real dominant idea in my life since I came out. Almost all I did was always aimed for the goal. With regret, I didn't manage to become succesful in this point even in the case of de facto partnership. Last month I had a passionate romance with an Indian guy that has finished as unexpectedly quick, as it started. Same the previous romance that lasted for about half a year. Misfortune in private life all the time - not serious relationships, unfaithfulnesses, immature guys, not ready for real manly deeds and responsibility + evident troubles if we go further and think of adopting some miserable child from orphan home. This all dictates I would change the primary aim of my life, and would first fulfill my own life thoroughly.
What items it would be?

1. Career.
2. Health + physical education.
3. Development in music, singing and perfomance.

All these three are right what I am working with, now. But mostly, it is chaotic and insufficient.
I have a deadline. Before Feb 2017 I should finish my juridical stuff with heritage, teaching at the courses on Internet Marketing, and to get operated on my nostrils that should give a better quality of my voice. After that I will become absolutely free to go on with my career.
But now I got a job offer from WebCanape (where I had worked) with not bad conditions. And it forced me to ponder over the things earlier than the deadline. The question of career includes several items:

• Region: Smolensk, Moscow, abroad, my place.
• Type: own business, organisation.
• Subject: SEO/Analytics, Web-programming.
• Purpose: money, more free time, PR, prospects.
• Direction: to go on, to start something new.

So you see, I am at the door of a complicated choice.
I made a pro and contra list what to choose. But it didn't give me the answer yet. The number of items would not give the answer. The weigh of some of them may be greater.
I need to make a decision about the WebCanape offer before Monday. I don't want to make a mistake, so I would not feel sorry about it as time goes on. Already now I need to understand, where to go further.

It's Good When Nobody Cares How Long You Work!

You know I worked as a teacher at a public school, then at a private school, then at university, after that at the Department of Education, and now finally changed everything and plunged into PPC, SEO, SMM and other IT things of the sort. Now I work at web-canape.
Almost everywhere they did care how long I was at work. Do you know who were these 'they'? Yes, usual co-workers! Noone should have been late at work because it might become his advantage. Even if I wanted to just stay late at work and to do my own things - I had no chance to do it without condemning eyes. Go home no matter what you want - be a part of the crowd!
I love the atmosphere of freedom at my contemporary work so much! I can stay at work as long as I want, and nobody would ever think of the reason why I stay longer. We are all young there, and I think this is right the best part of the new post-soviet generation that has much healthier points of view! Sometimes, I even have a feeling that I work not in Russia but in some West-European or American company!
Such work brings joy every day!

It's like at a Google Office!

Feb 11, 2010 - To See the Progress of Your Students

I think seeing the progress of the students is the most pleasant thing for any teacher. It is much more important to see it if you tutor them. And when you realize that the time was not wasted you feel joy.

Feb 9, 2010 - Learn When You Teach

Today, I realized how important to learn something when you teach. I had been trying to play a... not so difficult thing from The Phantom of the Opera and couldn't. And though music and foreign language don't seem to be alike I felt how difficult it is for my students to learn new words, and new grammar. Maybe you can understand your students only then when you are in fight for new skills yourself...

Feb 5, 2010 - Responsiveness

I think, I am a responsive guy. Actually, I haven't always been the one. But some events that happened with me some years ago changed me.

But, you know, responsiveness takes your time and force. You just may be lazy to say 'yes'. I don't recommend you to always agree to help, or forget about your own duties. But if you are really able to help, why not to?

Sure, the way of helping would be nice. But many people skimp on good acts, alas... That's why it is a real joy to find out that someone is different. That someone is ready to help you! This day let me to see a great deal of such people! My Form 5 theirselves offered me to help in an activity during the week of foreign languages at school. Some other comrades and friends of mine also responded to help a little! And also I got help from other guys in arranging another activity connected with the Youth Center of the Church of St. Varvara in Smolensk.

Thank you all, my dear responsive friends and comrades!

Jan 29-31, 2010 - A Good Ending of the Month :D

I didn't write anything two previous days. But these days were the happiest in the month, I believe!

On Jan 29 I even had no time to make a note! Work, some home duties, singing, playing the piano, volleyball training, some sweets and ryazhenka for supper, and just a few minutes to look through the mailing before sleep. I like the rhythm!

It was a funny story on the day. After I had worn my tracksuit in the utility room of my classroom before the training, I closed the door with the padlock. And just having done it I realized that the key was left in the utility room... My coat, and mobile phone were left there as well. Thank my father and my student Sveta who let me call him I opened the door without breaking the padlock or the door :) That situation was a good lesson to me: even if you are happy and enjoy everything in the world, you still need to think over what you are doing ;)

The training was also good and happy. Though first it was boring to play, but then all the sluggishness disappeared and turned... well... to craziness! Sometimes we just fumbled, but the other times we were shouting, and yelling, and trying not to lose the ball! There's one thing that I like in our team best. After we are divided into 2 teams, we become the teams. We play together, we are happy for our victories. But we are all cheerful if we (or some of us) have progress in playing, even if the victory is not ours.

Yesterday was a day of working on my dissertation. I didn't do much in it. But I keep on working, and that's not bad! Some months before have passed without good progress in the research.

Also, yesterday I found the notes of the musical The Phantom of the Opera. So, I'm going to play one of the parts on the next Tuesday. I'm happy!

What about today?

I'm having a rest, and listening to music. Soon, I'm going to read a book that a friend of mine presented me this Christmas. I want to finally finish it.

And now, in the end, I wish the February would bring us joy every day (read: we would like to have joy every day and do something for that)!

Jan 28, 2010 - Sci-Move

Today, I moved on with my dissertation. There was a big time's gap in working on it. So, now, I'm tired but happy that I finally continued my research.

Jan 18, 2010 - I've found my kefi, haven't I?..

I'm a bit unsure of saying that... But it seems to me, that I've found my kefi in working at school. Today was the first day in my life when I did my work in a bit creative way! The lessons have been done well and with positive emotions even in those forms which in general have lower level of English! I haven't yet a day when all my forms would make me happy during the workday :)))

By the way, do you know what's for kefi? It is from Greak. It is very hard to interpret its meaning in one word. It is a kind of inspiration, and loving what you do, that improves all your life, changes all things to the best!

There's one good movie, My Life In Ruins by Donald Petrie. It explains the meaning of the word very good.

Everything in my life seems changing to better. And there's now only one point not happend to me. I haven't yet found my 'she-Procopi'.

There's a trailer of the movie: